Customer Reviews
The Unmotivated Child 
2002-03-28
As a mental health therapist, I found this book to be a wonderful tool to use with frustrated parents. Does a great job of addressing those children who fall between the cracks--no obvious problem behind their repeated failures and nothing seems to motivate them.
The Truth Hurts--But How to Start the Mending 2001-02-07
I have discovered I am not alone! We see many children already giving up in elementary school. This book made me realize we need to address this situation, because it's not going to go away. THe basic need to be affirmed as a valued part of life is an understatement. We as parents and teachers, need to take into account how important it is to give the necessary time it takes to just listen to our kids. As a classroom teacher, it is helpful to be reminded that the children are often misbehaving out of frustration. "Don't take it personally" takes on a clearer meaning. We as parents will probably see traits we don't like in ourselves. When the authors says, "We're going to have to change" that smacked me in between the eyes! Keep reading! Of course the children are to take responsibility for their actions. THis book gives good advice. Please remember though: Parents have a MAJOR impact on their children. We may be with them more waking hours, but what the parents' relationship is far more important than ANY outsider's relationship.
Unmotivated Reader 
2000-06-11
I found this book to perfectly capture our 16 year old son. Irresponsible, lazy, ungrateful, self defeating, and hopeless--and I'm the cause of it all! Bunk. We have a loving happy home with two strong achieving parents. What is the natural course of the teenage years? Figure out Mom and Dad's buttons, and spend full time pushing them. We are acheivers, so he gives up. Does that mean we did a lousy job? No, it means he is 'distancing' himself from us and growing up. Unfortunately at this stage he doesn't know what he wants, so he forges his path by going against everything he knows we value. Our turn around came when his cousin moved in for the summer and showed him that it is better to work for what you want rather than work against what your parents want. The turn around was swift, but not without occassional setbacks. Parents, if you've given them a good foundation (as the author outlines) 99 out of 100 kids will survive the teenage years. There is hope, despite the depressing picture the author paints!
An excellent resource guide! 1998-05-11
I found myself reading about my own very bright underachieving son. It was like she was living in our home. We are working on the homework trap and how to get out of it. I hope it works!
An excellent resource! 1998-03-29
I found Rathvon's work to be *the* key factor in helping me, not only to identify why my bright adolescent son was underachieving in school, but also in helping me to remedy this situation. Fortunately, the outcome in our case was successful. I remain most grateful to the author.
Not enough focus on the successful part 
2007-10-05
I agree with the reviewer (K.H.L) who commented on putting the blame on us as parents, but I do see areas where I did contribute to my daughter's lack of motivation. I found this book very disappointing because almost all of the focus is on wrong ways to motivate. Several examples are used for each wrong way, and only one example given for success. This book is less about helping your student become successful, and more about what you are doing wrong.
Ever learning 2007-01-20
This book gives great insight into your unmotivated child's world. A great resource.
It was a lifesaver! 2007-01-12
This book helped me tremendously. I recommend it to anyone with children. The context is right on track and it's easy to read. As soon as I started reading it, I made changes to my behavior. This had a direct effect on my daughter and she improved a grade level in three subjects! Life is so much better in our household and now my daughter has the skills to be a successful student.
Extremely unhappy with this book, it pained me to get through it, please read on.... 
2006-10-20
I have 2 children, a boy,8, and a girl, just turning 7, (16 months apart). They have been raised practically as twins. My daughter has always wanted to do everything like her brother and always wanted to be equal with him (right down to the amount of juice in her cup). I have also raised them to be individuals. However, I have given them the same amount of love, attention, and affection right from birth. So why is it that my daughter is an overachiever and my son is an underachiever. My daughter is bursting with confidence and has a very healthy self-esteem, while my son gives up easily, and lacks confidence. The author, from the very beginning of this book, wants you to believe that it's our fault, as parents, that our children turn out to be underachievers by our lack of parenting skills. I do agree that in some cases, that may be true, but I have always loved my children unconditionally and always made them feel that it was ok to make mistakes, but to strive for more. And because of that, my son is the most thoughtful, sweet child. He will literally give you the shirt off his back. But yet, he still feels unmotivated and uncapable to do what other 3rd graders do. So I do not agree with Ms. Rathvon who says it's my lack of parenting skills that contributed to my sons lack of motivation. This is not to say that I think I am a perfect parent and that I am completely devoid of flaws, but I refuse to believe that it is anything I've done or haven't done that's puts my son in his position. If you are looking for a book to help boost your child's lack of motivation, you must read "Motivated Minds" by Deborah Stipek and Kathy Seal. It's the best book on the subject out there !!!
Excellent resource 2004-05-10
This book is a very good resource for parents of underachievers, former underachievers, and anyone who wants to understand the success of their child. Having read other reviews by readers discounting this book and discounting human psychology itself, I was compelled to write my own review. No one blames parents, especially Dr. Rathvon they do the best they can with what they've got; mental resources specifically. This book is for anyone who knows that their child is capable of so much more. It is never too late to fix, polish, and fine tune a learning mind. Every student has the ability to achieve.
