Editorial Review
Do YOU have what it takes to be a star? Simon Cowell reveals the answer and takes you behind the scenes of American Idol in this wickedly entertaining tell-all.
Since the debut of American Idol, puckish Brit judge Simon Cowell has become America’s most notorious critic—not only on account of his incredible instinct for spotting the next breakout musical stars, but for his hilarious, shockingly candid repartee with everyone who crosses his path. Now, true to form, he holds nothing back, offering you a backstage pass to America’s hottest show—the highlights, the gossip, the contestants who blew their chances—and takes you on a whirlwind tour of the music business while sharing his own insider opinions, on everything.
From his days in the mailroom at EMI Records to the creation of American Idol, Simon has always had a knack for judging talent—and for being center stage. Here, he tells the rollicking stories of his first insult (to his mother), his first music criticism (to first-grade teacher Mrs. Prigg), and his first image makeover (on his unfortunate younger brother). And of course, the side-splitting backstory of the birth of American Idol—and all the dreadful auditions, bad hair days, judges’ squabbles, juicy rumors, surprise triumphs, and #1 singles that followed.
With his trademark wit and brutal honesty, Simon delivers the real dish on: Who gave the best and worst performances on the show? What really goes on between the three judges (and what was it like to kiss Paula Abdul)? Who were the biggest divas when the cameras weren’t rolling? And, if you’re an aspiring Justin or J.Lo, you’ll also learn the trade secrets that only Simon knows: how to develop an image and make the most of your talent, how to find an agent or manager, how to nail an audition, and—should you be so lucky to make it to the top—how to stretch your 15 minutes into a career.
Packed with razor-sharp insights into music, the fame game, and pop-music powerhouses from the Beatles to Britney Spears, I Don’t Mean to Be Rude, But…is your ticket inside American Idol, and a highly amusing, no-holds-barred look at what it takes to make it big.
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Customer Reviews
Surprisingly drab and lacks any real insight 
2008-04-21
I shouldn't have been surprised that another celebrity "authored" book reads as if it were phoned in, but I expected more from the man at the center of the cultural phenomenon known as American Idol. Mr. Cowell takes us on what is essentially a humorless journey through the creation of his hit television talent show and offers very little insight into what drives him to create the next pop music star. After enjoying Mr. Cowell's barage of snarky comments on the show, I was surprised at how drab his "behind-the-scenes" tale reads. Clearly, this book was rushed to publish in order to capitalize on the transitory success of American Idol. At least we can read about his predictions for the winners (and losers) from the first two seasons of the show and see how many of those predictions are accurate, and how many, like this book, fall disappointingly flat.
Zesty 
2008-03-09
I actually liked the book. Cowell discusses important aspect of his life and career, and offers insights into the American Idol phenomenom. Note: Unedited version of Justin Guarini's audition shows Cowell gushing over Guarini as "amazing." In the book, Cowell is not as enthusiastic. Other than bald predictions about famous couples' chances of staying together (which turn out to be wrong), this book is worth the money.
Simon Cowell : Witty, Talented, and Fantastically Egotistical. 2007-01-26
I truly have enjoyed the American Idol judge's book, I hope he writes some more books about the music industry and the show. Simon is very music business savvy, and not only proves his creditability in this book, but entertains readers with his wit and his backstage gossip! I loved it, and LOVE Simon!
Interesting Man, Interesting Book 2006-04-20
I've always been a fan of Mr. Cowell for his brutal honesty and offbeat charm. Still, his book surprised me with its depth and clarity. It's easy to see he has a brilliant knack for the music business as well as an enlightened view of life in general. Cowell describes his childhood in England and rise to the top in an entertaining, witty way, while paying heed to Idol fans by telling humorous behind-the-scenes stories. This book is an informative and enjoyable read for anyone - who knew Simon Cowell was such a fascinating writer?
" I Don't Mean to be Rude But This is a Great Book" 
2006-02-09
Enter Simon Cowell. He's a fashon critic who always has to be "honest" and sincere. You do have to feel for Simon though. Putting up with William Hung is pretty hard to do. Simon does many eight things in this book though. He insults Madonna, Michael Jackson etc. I liked his true love section especially P. Diddy and Himself and Michael jackson and anyone. I liked his Idol chapters and his tips to succeed.
Fascinating and Funny 2005-06-22
Do YOU have what it takes to be a star? Simon Cowell reveals the answer and takes you behind the scenes of American Idol in this wickedly entertaining tell-all.
Since the debut of American Idol, puckish Brit judge Simon Cowell has become America’s most notorious critic—not only on account of his incredible instinct for spotting the next breakout musical stars, but for his hilarious, shockingly candid repartee with everyone who crosses his path. Now, true to form, he holds nothing back, offering you a backstage pass to America’s hottest show—the highlights, the gossip, the contestants who blew their chances—and takes you on a whirlwind tour of the music business while sharing his own insider opinions, on everything.
From his days in the mailroom at EMI Records to the creation of American Idol, Simon has always had a knack for judging talent—and for being center stage. Here, he tells the rollicking stories of his first insult (to his mother), his first music criticism (to first-grade teacher Mrs. Prigg), and his first image makeover (on his unfortunate younger brother). And of course, the side-splitting backstory of the birth of American Idol—and all the dreadful auditions, bad hair days, judges’ squabbles, juicy rumors, surprise triumphs, and #1 singles that followed.
With his trademark wit and brutal honesty, Simon delivers the real dish on: Who gave the best and worst performances on the show? What really goes on between the three judges (and what was it like to kiss Paula Abdul)? Who were the biggest divas when the cameras weren’t rolling? And, if you’re an aspiring Justin or J.Lo, you’ll also learn the trade secrets that only Simon knows: how to develop an image and make the most of your talent, how to find an agent or manager, how to nail an audition, and—should you be so lucky to make it to the top—how to stretch your 15 minutes into a career.
Packed with razor-sharp insights into music, the fame game, and pop-music powerhouses from the Beatles to Britney Spears, I Don’t Mean to Be Rude, But…is your ticket inside American Idol, and a highly amusing, no-holds-barred look at what it takes to make it big.
Rudeness is part of our common lives. It's called mediocrity 2005-06-12
This is a "clumsy" book. My first impression was that it was written to deliver inconspicuously hidden messages to his irreverent friends. The next impression, as I sifted through his scruffy childhood, was that he did not possess any impressionable talent. Instead, he created a delusional rationale for writing such a book in the first place.
I watched American Idol on television and was intrigued by Simon Cowell. I purchased the book to gain a better understanding about him, the celebrity industry, and his insightful `dynamo' concepts. Unfortunately, all I encountered throughout the book was a rambling hypocrite who, in the end, chastised everyone for pursuing celebrity status unless they were fortunate enough to be miraculously chosen by him.
To be fair, American Idol is pure entertainment. Judging talent on time constraints and lurid subjectivity is the type of medium that will thrive in the spotlight. Millions devour the mindless intrigue.
I have seen incredible performances. But those recitals live beyond the winds of subjectivity even when those artists display eccentric personalities, vitriolic egos...and being in the right place at the right time.
One unfortunate theme oozing through Simon Crowell is his decision to export his ugly behavior from Britain to America. Perhaps it was already here, waiting for him and the timing could not have been more perfect since America must tolerate greedy politicians / corporations today with their ugly voter accountability / customer service.
I am disheartened by the fact that Simon Cowell did not spend more time focusing on his talent and business prowess. It is undecided whether he a creative genius. Unfortunately, that is the theme for a better book for a more civilized world.
An Inspiring Success Story 2005-02-15
If you ever wanted to know what it takes to make a hit in the entertainment industry, this is the book for you.
Simon Cowell describes his journey from the mailroom at EMI, to his discovery of pop star Sinitta, to his work with writer/producers Stock, Aitken, and Waterman in transforming Sinitta into his first million-dollar hit, all the way through the 90s to the phenomenal hit show American Idol. The book was published in December 2003, and so includes the first two seasons of the show.
For anyone interested in the business side of the pop music industry (and the entertainment industry in general), this book should be inspiring. Simon describes how he constantly had to fight to convince record execs that his vision was true and profitable. There are also many juicy stories along the way involving Eddie Murphy, David Hasselhoff, and Ryan Seacrest among others.
But for me, the real strength of this biography is the inspiring tale of Simon's persistence and business savvy as he rose through the ranks of the music industry to become the world's best known (and maybe most hated) music producer. Simon clearly explains what makes Clay Aiken, Ruben Studdard, and Kelly Clarkson stand out from so many other talented singers, and the lasting impression is that anyone who is willing to work hard enough, has luck and talent on their side, has stage presence, mental focus, and at least some business savvy can succeed in the entertainment industry.
In many ways, it is a business just like any other. This book is a roadmap to success.
Stacey Cochran
Funny, but harsh in too many places 
2004-09-12
Simon Cowell wrote a good book, but he lets the rudeness go into overload far too many times. He didn't have to say that about Madonna saying that she's over. Madonna will do what she wants and can get away with it on her own terms! He liked Kelly and Ruben and Tamyra, but was cold on some of the other singers, like Clay. And he even bashed the legendary BOB DYLAN! To me, Bob Dylan is a dynamic songwriter and artist and Simon's going to ruin his credibility by saying that. He could have explained more about the pressures of the music industry now to have a quick hit, because that's what they're doing now. But Simon plays that rudeness factor a bit too much. He has too much of a Type A personality in thinking that the artist has to have everything in them to impress him. This perfectionist thing is what drags the book down and keeps you from hearing what he really thinks. Simon is funny on much of the book, but offensive, arrogant, cocky and outlandish in others. I can't imagine him doing a novel anytime soon and saying "dreadful" maybe 563 times in that book. Because "dreadful" is said over and over and overdone to ad nauseum in this music advice book.
Simon has so much of that bad boy, rude, bully persona that P Diddy could put him in any of his videos.
SIMON COWELL'S REAL TALENT IS.... 2004-08-23
Comedy writing. Simon's less than angelic episodes are good for a delightful chuckle. After reading this book cover-to-cover in one sitting because it's impossible to put down once you get started, I have a totally new opinion of Simon: he is a very funny guy. I was entertained & intend to recommend this book to anyone looking for a good laugh.
