Getting the Love You Want. A Guide for Couples, 20th Anniversary Edition

Editorial Review

REVISED AND WITH A NEW FOREWORD

ARE YOU GETTING THE LOVE YOU WANT?

Originally published in 1988, Getting the Love You Want has helped millions of couples attain more loving, supportive, and deeply satisfying relationships. The 20th anniversary edition contains extensive revisions to this groundbreaking book, with a new chapter, new exercises, and a foreword detailing Dr. Hendrix’s updated philosophy for eliminating all negativity from couples’ daily interactions, allowing readers of the 2008 edition to benefit from his ongoing discoveries during his last two decades of work.

Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., in partnership with his wife, Helen LaKelly Hunt, PhD., originated Imago Relationship Therapy, a unique healing process for couples, prospective couples, and parents. Together they have more than thirty years’ experience as educators and therapists and their work has been translated into more than 50 languages, with Imago practiced by two thousand therapists worldwide. Harville and Helen have six children and live in New York and New Mexico.

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Customer Reviews

Getting the love you want

2008-05-03
This is an excellent book for couples and also singles in demystifying attraction and empowering individuals for healing in the context of relationships.

Best I've read on relationships

2008-03-11
This book is great! It really explains why we react the way we do and can really improve your relationship. The reading is easy sometimes gets a little boring but the content is worth it. The idea is that we marry or get into a relationship with someone who will help us heal ourselves because they have faults that either our caretakers had or that are part of what we secretly want to be. It also has some great exercises for improving your relationship. A must read for anyone dedicated to their partner.

Fantastic Customer Service AND Book!!!!!

2008-02-29
Of all the so called consumer based organizations Amazon is the only one that is in the league alone with Consumer Reports! All these other so-called self proclaimed consumer based companies just don't have the business model to compare. Ramble on Amazon!!!!

The premier couples therapy of today

2008-02-12
This is the best couples therapy I have come across. It is theoretically and practically sound. What a relief to discover the unconscious reasons we choose the partner we do, and how to work through the inevitable conflicts that arise in the adult committed intimate partnership in today's world. The vision that the purpose of modern relationships is growth and healing is very refreshing. It is so seductive to think the purpose is happiness and relaxation. But if that were the case, we would need to eliminate all conflict. But how can there be growth and healing without conflict? "Conflict is growth trying to happen." It is all important HOW we work through our conflicts, not try to eliminate them. This is MUST READING for everyone interested in understanding modern couplehood where equality is desired rather than male dominance.
- Bruce Crapuchettes, Ph.D., licensed psychologist, couples therapist.

An excelent understanding of why we love who we love

2008-02-10
If you suspect that you have a part in both your dreams and nightmares in your relationship, then this book will help you to understand how you dance the dance of relationship. Practical and simple.

Helpful help

2008-07-16
This book was right on I reviewed it many time. I gave it four stars because the book was simple and made since. Nothing complicated. The reason it did not make 5 stars is because it only relates to people in a relationship. Not those looking.

great service!

2008-07-12
Came very fast, just as ordered, I would order from here again. Awesome, Awesome book!! I can't say enough. Answers every question you ever had about a relationship. Even though Harvey is a minister, he is also a PHd, and his book is more psychological than religious in any way. I would highly reccomend this book to all couples, and to anyone who is interested in making a relationship work.
Great! Thanks very much!

Outstanding

2008-05-31
Fantastic easy to understand information, very helpful for young couples or people who have been together for many, many years. The advice and suggestions are easy to implement and have already made a huge difference in our lives. This author provides simple remedies providing hope for couple who need assistance for creating the relationship of their dreams.

Repairing Your Relationship (and Your Childhood)

2008-05-28
Before counselor Harville Hendrix, Ph.D. teaches you how to improve your relationship, he asks you to think about why you were attracted to your partner in the first place. The answer, he explains, is that you were looking for a mate who possesses the same basic qualities as your parents. Why? Because people subconsciously seek relationships with those who will exorcise their childhood pain. Unfortunately, most people tend to reopen - as opposed to healing - these wounds in their adult liaisons, leading to the "power struggle" that ensues in many relationships. Hendrix and his wife, Dr. Helen Lakelly Hunt, say that the way out of this destructive cycle is to practice the tenants of "Imago Relationship Therapy," which they created. Their therapeutic approach includes making a true, lifelong commitment, treating each other in a loving manner, learning how to communicate constructively and eliminating negativity from your relationship. You may well find some benefits in the Imago approach even if you don't fully buy Hendrix's basic parent-seeking premise. The authors have trained some 2,000 therapists to use this approach, although Part III offers solid exercises you can do yourself. If you are seeking a relationship self-help book that discusses how to avoid getting hurt, how to deepen your communication and how to build a long-term connection, getAbstract recommends this bestseller.

Had some useful info

2008-05-07
A lot of good stuff in here to offer some help, but nothing magical.
Not a chore to read however like many books on the subject.
For a few things I did get from it that helped my life I would call it a good purchase and it deserves 4 stars.