Anger and the Indigo Child :: Education by Design Store

Customer Reviews

This is a remarkable book!

2007-10-09
Insightful. Practical. Invaluable. "Search Inside" and you'll see that every page of this book offers a gem: a principle, a how-to, and often times an "aha" or deep understanding of the emotional patterns you've tried to figure out for years.

"Anger is the emotional response when our needs are not met," this author explains. "It is a purposeful emotion, and a proportional emotion. But when anger loses its proportionality and its integrity, then it is developing the properties of rage. And rage lacks emotional conscience. That is why it causes us to say things we don't mean and do things we regret."

Lancaster also explains that love is the emotion that manages anger; and that adding to our own supply of love within is what gives us the capacity to manage our own anger - or, as the principles of "transforming anger into love" teach, respond with an option to anger: patience, understanding, compassion, or forgiveness. Lancaster also helps the reader understand that self-love is not self-ish, and that unless we add to the love within, we have not added to our own capacity to transcend automatic, unproductive anger-based patterns.

These insights, along with the suggestions for what to do now that I understood anger better, enabled me to change my own anger patterns and also the patterns my children and I were enacting ... over and over and over.

I say that this book helps anyone who is seeking understanding and practical principles for transforming the patterns that compromise emotional well-being. It certainly helped me!

anger and the indigo child

2007-10-08
This book is not for me and here is why. It is the authors atempt to push her trademark "transforming anger into love," under the guise of the indigos. I found the book to be very New Age fluff. I appears to me this book encourages repression and denial. And the attribution of things, at least some of which every human being has experienced to hidden symptoms of anger tm. is absolutely rediculous. This book reminds me of evangelicals who tout that anger is a sin. In addition, if taken seriously, this philosophy easily feeds into our culture of denial which feeds into repressive emotions. This book treads dangerously close to encouraging the submerging and denial of anger (passion, the leads to much creativity AND ADVOCACY when directed and harnassed). I would like to suggest Kathleen Fischer's TRANSFORMING FIRE: WOMEN USING ANGER CREATIVELY.Transforming Fire: Women Using Anger Creatively

Anger and the Indigo Child

2007-02-19
Excellent book with deep insights into our relationships with the indigo children. Many revelations about dealing with our own personal anger.

Transforming Anger is good for Every One

2006-03-31
After having read just half of this book, I was using the techniques to overcome the trauma of a criminal intrusion in my life.

The author has gone beyond others on this topic to map out the journey of anger and a possible pathway back to peace. I think any book on this subject is exploratory. The terrain is uncharted by experts in psychology to my knowledge.

I found this book very readable, encouraging, helpful, and somewhat miraculous in terms of applicability to my circumstances.

I do not know if there is a standard of excellence by which to measure this kind of work. I applaud anyone for trying to write on the subject of anger and how to work with it. It is certainly relevant for any modern city dweller. Three hundred cheers to Dianne Lancaster.

great advice

2004-12-03
This book offers advice and practical methods to help not only your child but your entire family handle, redirect and diffuse anger. Every parent and teacher should read this so they can become a part of the solution of raising a society of happy, communicative, calm children. I also believe in teaching children self-calming techniques like breathing,affimations,and relaxation.

I recommend audio book/CDs called "Indigo Dreams" and "Indigo Ocean Dreams" to anyone that has taken the initiative to help children manage anger.

With Anger Awareness and Action, We All WIN

2004-08-31
Helps all children and families better understand and navigate the intense emotional patterns that anger and needs can create. Filled with insights, how-to's and practical guidelines for Transforming Anger Into Love(tm). Recommended by professionals.

Valuable for All Parents, especially those with Indigo child

2003-07-20
More attention to Indigo Children. There's a movement afoot to raise the societal and parental consciousness about a "special" group of children known as Indigos. The writings in the field suggest that they're significantly different than other children of their generation-the children of today. I suspect that those kids that we identify as "Indigo" are but the leading edge of an entire generation of such people...which makes every book on this topic substantially more meaningful. Books on this topic-including this one-should be required reading for university students preparing to be teachers and counselors, let alone those who are practicing in the field already.

Chapter One of this book explains the terminology, so you don't have to scurry around looking for references to understand the perspectives. Nevertheless, I'd recommend you read "The Indigo Children" by Lee Carroll and Jan Tober and "The Care and Feeding of Indigo Children" by Doreen Virtue. Their work will give you deep insight into Indigos, while this book focuses on anger management issues and techniques and their relationship to Indigo children...and others.

At first, scanning the table of contents, I suspected this was the work of an anger therapist or seminar leader looking for another place to promote her work. Part of this attitude on my part came from seeing the trademark indicator on several of Lancaster's theories and approaches. As I read the book, I came to realize that the trademarks show that this professional has done some fine, groundbreaking work that is worthy of respect and recognition. There's a tremendous amount of good content in this volume.

Chapter Three caught my attention: 44 Ways to Show Kids You Care. There's a whole book right there, I pondered. And, sure enough, there is a great deal of advice in those pages. Thinking of how I'd applied the principles with my own children, I patted myself on the back reading a few of them-emphasis on the word "few." Every parent should have this list on a laminated card within easy reach.

The book continues with the same value, chapter after chapter. Not every word is an original thought of Dianne Lancaster. She brings in chapters written by others or tapping into the work of others. This technique makes two statements to me: first, Lancaster realizes she doesn't have all the answers (bravo!), and second, she knows who does have answers and invests an extra effort to be sure the reader gains maximum benefit from her book.

I will admit that there are parts of this book, like the chapter on symbology, that stretched credibility for me. You should know that I'm fairly well hard-wired to solid knowledge and some of the approaches in this field push the edges of my envelope. What does this mean to you? As a reader, your mind will be stretched. Even if you reject some part(s) of what you read in this book, you will gain so much that you'll want to read some sections again. The book is designed to facilitate that kind of usage, so go right ahead.

Glossary, Resource List, no index. It would have been nice to have an index, but the Table of Contents is so comprehensive, you don't really need an index.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to compose a letter to my Indigo child. Yes, a letter: to give her time to re-read, re-think, and absorb, as you'll do with this book.

A truly transforming reading experience 2003-06-21
Only two days after our despair as parents of a beautiful ten year old daughter had risen almost beyond our capacity to cope, I received Dianne Lancaster's request to review Anger and the Indigo Child. A book I would otherwise not have bought, because I associate the expression "indigo children" with New Age, which I label "not of interest to me". For me this book has been an eye-opener on all kinds of levels.

As parents we were 100% sure the diagnosis "pdd-nos and severely retarded" was 100% wrong. And we had to fight prejudices of experts, teachers, social workers, etc. who were all convinced that a) they were absolutely right and b) we were "in denial".
In the meantime our daughter has proven them wrong. As soon as she started attending "normal" education she flourished and was soon regarded as extremely intelligent, but with a very special attitude. The "Most common traits of Indigo children" chapter in the book beautifully describes the traits of our daughter and many of her classmates.

The chapters about anger, transforming anger, recognizing angerpatterns have helped me tremendously and instantly to recognize and release my own anger, fear and sadness. This has resulted within a week from starting to read the book in a transformation of not only my emotions but in the transformation of our daughter's emotions as well. We are now one week away from summer holidays and last week the teachers at school applauded our daughter. "She seems totally changed, as if she has cheered up in all her cells" one of the teachers said.

Recognizing the building-up of emotions as well as the suppression of anger, fear and sadness gives me a huge advantage as a mother, as a wife, as a human being and as a professional trainer of NLP.

I cannot thank Dianne Lancaster enough for writing this must-read master piece, that can transform your anger into love. Bravo!!

Breakthrough Book! 2003-06-18
Dianne Lancaster's wonderful book offers valuable insight and practical-step-by-step information about how to support the development and emotional well-being of a new generation of kids.

These children are pushing us forward on a cultural learning curve. We are raising a generation of more finely attuned beings who feel more want more and who have more to contribute. Ms. Lancaster elucidates this phenomenon and explains why these children are unwilling and constitutionally unable to tolerate outworn models of communication and power that hurt.

She shows how we can relate to them in ways that work for them, transforming anger and frustration to love and understanding. She also explains how we can learn to do this for ourselves, learning to recognize and address our own needs and anger, so that we don't respond to them automatically, in a triggered state.

This book brings so much information, clarity and just plain truth to the subject that readers will want to savor it slowly, allowing the material to resonate and integrate.

My experience in reading it was similar to first time reading works of Harville Hendrix, Catherine Ponder and Louise Hay: a sense of enlivenment, joyful recognition that I as a reader had been given a marvelous gift. This author's contributions are of the same caliber and teach us what we need to know right now for our kids and ourselves. I recommend it most highly.

Kanta Bosniak, Director, The Alpha Learning institute

enlighting 2003-06-14
This book is a slower read because the information needs to be processed. I had many "aha moments" reading it. I recomend it to anyone who is interested in helping their child and themselves to be a better parent, teacher or caretaker. Enjoy.