The Stop Walking on Eggshells Workbook. Practical Strategies for Living With Someone Who Has Borderline Personality Disorder

Customer Reviews

excellent resource!

2006-09-01
this book has proven to be an excellent resource for family members and co-workers who have expressed some frustrations in their relationships with individuals with BPD. it provides helpful background information to help people understand the problem and conceptualize it. it provides realistic exercises and suggested approaches that usually seem to be very helpful in relating with individuals with BPD. if one book to provide, i prefer this book over the other eggshell book in that it is better received, more understandable, and more useful. some patients' loved ones take it and hide it for a while as they begin reading it. almost all find that eventually it is most effective when there is real cooperation between partners on learning new, more effective ways of relating. i've given out at least one dozen copies of this book and it is very popular. i believe it is well worth the price, new, given the tools and hope that it can provide.

Excellent for some, unhelpful for me

2005-11-03
This book may be an excellent resource for many people in a relationship with someone who has BPD - but it wasn't very helpful for me. BPD is a disorder with many variations (a person only needs to meet five out of nine criteria to be diagnosed), and although the authors do a good job of outlining the different types of BPD in the first couple of chapters, all their advice seems focused on borderlines who rage, are abusive and manipulative. I found little in this book to help me cope with my girlfriend's self-injury, suicide attempts, clinginess and dissociation.

I have two other reservations about the Stop Walking on Eggshells books. The first is that they seem to encourage the worrying trend of people "diagnosing" their loved ones with mental illnesses - something only a mental health professional is qualified to do. Kreger claims to be the ex-partner of someone with BPD, yet her ex has never been diagnosed with the condition - she just suspects he may have it. Secondly, the books are very negative about people with BPD, seeming to assume that they never admit they have a problem, try to seek help, or work on their issues. From participating in online communities, I know many people with BPD who not only do all these things but are making tremendous progress, and in some cases have even recovered. I understand the importance of accepting that your BPD friend or family member may never change, but please don't tar all borderlines with the same brush!

Before buying this book, I suggest reading the back cover of its sister volume, "Stop Walking on Eggshells". If the description there sounds like your relationship, you'll probably gain a lot from reading this book. If not, look elsewhere. A book I found far more helpful was "Allies in Healing" by Laura Davis.

Stop Walking on Eggshells Workbook

2005-05-27
I HIGHLY recommend this workbook and its companion book of the same name. It is a MUST for anyone who has to deal with BPD. The workbook provides you with wonderful, easy to follow tools that will help you maintain your sanity when dealing with the BPD in your life. It also helps you to understand that it is not "you" and provides valuable insight into why BPDs act the way they do.

Most importantly it makes you realize that there is NOTHING you can do to change a person with BPD, BUT you can educate yourself and learn how to use the book's tools to effectively communicate with a BPD and not get "sucked" in to their chaotic life!!

I helped my husband practice the techniques in the book prior to a mediation session and while the first three meetings consisted of talking in circles, the last meeting was "successful." No, the techniques didn't make the BPD stop mirroring or projecting her actions onto him and didn't stop her from lying and playing the constant "victim", but my husband did maintain his composure and actually got a few things accomplished - and anyone who deals with BPD knows that to accomplish anything is a major success, no matter how small the accomplishment!!

It is truly amazing, if you practice and REMEMBER what you learn, you can help make what previously felt like a hopeless situation, a little more bearable.

Practical Strategies

2004-03-19
Kreger and Shirley's book lives up to its title. This book is so good that it can be used by itself. In addition, I strongly recommend Surviving a Borderline Parent: How to Heal Your Childhood Wounds & Build Trust, Boundaries, and Self-Esteem by Roth and Friedman.

Sincerely,

John

This book will clear it all up 2003-11-24
I searched many resources looking for what could have possibly been wrong with my ex. This book was amazing. As I read it, I realized that it was exactly my situation.
This is a great book, easy to read and right to the point. It will open doors you didn't know were there.

spouse of undiagnosed borderline 2008-03-30
I had received "Stop Walking on Eggshells" from a family member. Upon reading it, I just knew that I would get the help I so needed with the workbook. I highly recommend this workbook in conjunction with the book for all who are dealing with someone who has been diagnosed with or suspected to have this disorder. I think you'll find that it seems as if you've written it yourself!!!

He is not crazy 2007-07-13
If you have a loved one acting unreasonable one day and loving the next,read this book They may not be on drugs not Bi-polar but Borderline Personality Disorder maybe after reading you will have an understanding of the behavior.It is treatable and gives we who live with this person hope the .Ranting , raving blambing ia explained along with sggestions on coping..Best book on this subject I have found.....

Highly recommended 2007-06-26
A godsend and an eye opener. Well worth getting if BPD traits are present in your loved one.

Essential 2007-06-09
This workbook is essential for anyone who has a loved one with BPD or suspected BPD traits.

Borderline personality disorder 2006-11-06
Excellent resource for dealing with someone who has Borderline Personality Disorder. Great help for understanding BPD behavior and how to deal with it.