Customer Reviews
A Must for Dealing with Narcissists and Moving Forward 
2008-04-20
I Have found this very well written compelling book with many wonderful stories and clinical vignettes to be a marvelous source for understanding the inner workings of the narcissistic personality disorder. Dr. Martinez-Lewi offers an upclose, in your face look at the narcissist. She also provides substantial specific ways of dealing with these personality disorders which made me feel victorious and allowed me to maintain my self respect. There is a spiritual perspective to this book as well that offers the reader more opportunities to move beyond narcissism toward inner healing and peace.
a helpful book 2008-03-25
Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life is a helpful book for all who find themselves entangled with narcissists. Linda Martinez-Lewi's vivid descriptions of clients and famous people with narcissistic personality disorders will educate the inexperienced and unsuspecting about the damage that narcissists can inflict on others. In my work as a physician, I have seen that this damage can be serious. The book will be especially helpful to the many people whose childhoods leave them vulnerable to finding validation as adults through admission to the "special circles" of narcissists, whether in marriage, work alliances, or spiritual cults. I will be recommending Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life to anyone who has been sucked into a narcissist's web, is being targeted by a narcissist's rage, or feels crazy with his own irresolvable rage after being spit out of a special circle.
Some Help At Last 2008-03-12
Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life is a much needed read. After years of dealing with and trying to cope with narcissistic personalities here is some help for ordinary people. I very much appreciate the information given and the many examples of narcissistic behavior. The author helped me understand that narcissists are found in all walks of life. The insights into geniuses like Pablo Picasso and Ayn Rand are priceless. For me, the most helpful part came toward the end of the book where Martinez-Lewi provides us with strategies for our encounters with narcissists.
Willem Bynagte
False Sense of Safety 
2008-03-11
Although Martinez-Lewi makes reading about narcissists entertaining, she fails to deliver the goods. Freeing yourself from a narcissist takes more than meditation and a healthy self-esteem, especially if you are in a personal relationship with one. Narcissists can be cruel and if you're fortunate, they will dump you. However, some narcissists do not give up their prey that easily. This kind of narcissist will never leave you alone, they will hunt you, stalk you, and because they believe if they can't have you no one else can, they will even kill you. If it was so simple to recognize a narcissist as the author professes, then you wouldn't have become one of their victims and wouldn't be reading this book. It would be more helpful to ask yourself why you attracted them to you in the first place and then change whatever it was, because that is the real way to avoid having a narcissist in your life and your best defense against them. They only prey on those who they know will supply them with what they need, and it doesn't matter what environment they or you are in. It is important to remember, these people are potentially lethal, just read the headlines of the many who are murdered by former lovers, boyfriends, and spouses. Most of the offenders are narcissists. Don't let this or any other book on narcissists give you a false sense of safety. It could be your undoing.
Excellent reading 2008-03-10
This is a review by Dawn Nicholas. This is an excellent tool for dealing with the distracting and frustrating behavior of the narcissist in your life. I learned how to identify the narcissist and learned practical and effective tools for how to effectively deal with these individuals. This is a useful and interesting book and has truly helped me. Not only in my personal relationships but business relationships as well. I feel very empowered by this new knoweledge.
Looking forward to more books by Martinez-Lewi.
The Best Resource For Understanding and Handling Narcissists 2008-07-25
Linda Martinez-Lewi has written an extraordinary book that goes to the very core of the narcissistic personality. We live in a narcissistic world much of the time. Many of us have to deal with these self-absorbed, manipulative, and ruthless personalities in the work place and in our own families. Both of my parents were narcissists and it was exceedingly difficult and psychologically unbearable most of the time. I never felt valued in my early years as an authentic, unique human being. My parents were either insisting on molding me to their likenesses or ignoring me. I have had my share of good psychotherapy and most of my childhood wounds are healed. This book has helped me and will assist many others in identifying and handling narcissists who inevitably come our way. The author presents a number of detailed profiles from her clincial practice that are informative and a joy to read. She gives us the tools we need for engaging these individuals with calmness and confidence.
I Now Handle Narcissists With Great Confidence 2008-07-17
A few years ago I ended a business partnership with an individual who turned out to be an excessively self-entitled, self-absorbed narcissist. He and I graduated from the same dental school. Stan (I'll call him) received the highest academic honors in dental school and was considered one of the best students during his professional training. He appeared to be very competent and seemed to have a gift for relating to people. His portfolio was impeccable. We put up the money for all of our equipment, the office lease, and personnel. At first, things went smoothly. After a few months I began to see a pattern in Stan that was troubling. He was contantly criticizing the staff, belittling them in front of others. I discovered that he was overcharging for the work he was doing and insisting that patients have expensive dental work that they didn't need. I tactfully called Stan on this and he became furious. A number of times he showed up late and expected me to pick up the slack. When I asked him about this behavior, he went ballistic as if it was my role to automatically take over for him. Finally, it became impossible to work with him. At the end, he insisted that he had paid for all of the equipment and tried to stiff me with this bill and payment of the lease. He ended up with more money than he was entitled to. Since that time I have formed a new dental group and it is doing well. There are no narcissists in this office. I have made sure of this. Don't get me wrong. There are many marvelous hard-working, brilliant dentists that are not narcissistic. After my experience with Stan, I studied narcissistic personalities and learned about their childhood origins, their psychodynamics (what makes them tick) and how to deal with them. I have recently read this excellent book on the narcissistic personality disorder by Dr. Linda Martinez-Lewi. The case studies and vignettes from her clinical practice are invaluable. The author provides the reader with a variety of strategies he/she can use for identifying and handling them with great success. This is one of the best resources on this prevalent personality disorder of our time, the narcissist.
As A Psychotherapist---A Very Helpful Book To My Clients 2008-07-09
I have been a psychotherapist for a number of years. Many of my clients come to therapy due to severe emotional pain in their personal relationships, particularly spouses and partners. A growing number of my clients are dealing with individuals who appear to have it all. They can be irresistible, vibrantly magnetic, and cleverly manipulative. Many of these spouses and partners (men and women) are narcissistic personalities. I hear stories from clients who have tried for many years to make these relationships with narcissists work. They tell stories of emotional abuse, deceit, coldness and frequent betrayals. In addition to my study of narcissistic personalities and clinical work, I find that there are a few excellent books on the subject that are accessible to everyone. This current book by Dr. Linda Martinez-Lewi is a fine example of a clinician who assists the reader in identifying exactly how and why the narcissist operates the way he(she)does.She explains his tremendous self entitlement, ruthlessness and lack of empathy. The author presents many tools for handling the narcissist successfully, combining numerous clinical vignettes from her clinical practice. I highly recommend this book to all of my clients and to all of those who encounter narcissists in their lives. We walk in a world today where narcissists are handsomely rewarded. This book is a great contribution in helping us handle the narcissists around us with confidence and a healthy sense of self worth.
This Book Goes to the Narcissist's Core--A Great Help 2008-06-29
I am a psychotherapist who works with a variety of clients. Some of them are dealing with spouses and ex-spouses and partners who are narcissistic personalities. I have read a number of books on narcissism and have studied the subject. Besides her clinical training and work with clients, the author has a deep empathic comprehension of the psychological suffering individuals experience who are being constantly wounded by a narcissist. The author provides us with an in-depth view of the narcissist, wearing an elaborate mask that charms and beguiles the world and the dark unconscious narcissistic core that contains endless rage, treacherous deceit, and concealed paranoia. Dr. Martinez-Lewi presents a variety of strategic methods for successfully dealing with the narcissistic personality. We live in a narcissistically driven society and must deal with narcissists frequently these days. I recommend this book to all of my clients. It has helped them immensely.
Great Insights into the Narcissist: Getting Beyond Heartbreak 2008-06-25
I recently broke up with the woman I was about to marry. We had been going together for a couple of years. Rosalie (that's the name I will use) was one of the most beautiful women I have ever met. I was attracted to her charm and fell in love with her right away. I knew quite soon that she could be temperamental and demanding but I was so taken with her that I ignored her character flaws. As we began to date more seriously, Rosalie became more critical of me and more demanding. I would catch her in lies all the time. I kept making excuses for her. She asked for a large sum of money to purchase a watch that she had been eyeing for a long time. I gave her the money and she promised to pay me back. She never did. I also found out that she was cheating on me with two other guys. Rosalie never thought about anyone but herself. She hurt me so many times with her extreme self absorption and her expecting me to be perfect. Even when I did everything she asked, it wasn't good enough. She'd scream at me and tell me I was a worthless idiot. Finally, she threw me away. I was so desperate, I didn't think I could live without her. I having been seeing a good psychotherapist. This helped me realize that Rosalie is a narcissist, that she suffers from a serious personality disorder. I have done a lot of work in therapy and am in the course of recovering from this loss. The therapist recommended that I read a book by Dr. Linda Martinez-Lewi called "Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life". This book offers a clear analysis with many compelling examples of the narcissistic personality disorder. The author gave me a number of tools to use when dealing with narcissists. She described Rosalie perfectly. I really enjoyed the marvelous stories about famous narcissists like Pablo Picasso and Frank Lloyd. I highly recommmend this terrific book. It has helped me to heal and find more peace in my life.
