Editorial Review
Do you hunger for skills to improve the quality of your relationships, to deepen your sense of personal empowerment or to simply communicate more effectively? Unfortunately, for centuries our culture has taught us to think and speak in ways that can actually perpetuate conflict, internal pain and even violence. Nonviolent Communication partners practical skills with a powerful consciousness and vocabulary to help you get what you want peacefully.
In this internationally acclaimed text, Marshall Rosenberg offers insightful stories, anecdotes, practical exercises and role-plays that will dramatically change your approach to communication for the better. Discover how the language you use can strengthen your relationships, build trust, prevent conflicts and heal pain. Revolutionary, yet simple, NVC offers you the most effective tools to reduce violence and create peace in your life—one interaction at a time.
Over 150,000 copies sold and now available in 20 languages around the world. More than 250,000 people each year from all walks of life are learning these life-changing skills.
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Customer Reviews
New Skills 
2008-09-08
This is an down to earth, practical tool for improving your ability to communicate well with other human beings, those close to you and those in situations in which you are connected in other ways. Using ways to clearly convey needs and notice the needs of others is a desperately essential requirement in a warring world. Well worth your attention and practice.
Enlightening, challenging, inspiring, educationally practical 2008-08-31
"Nonviolent communications: A Language of Life" is an update to an ancient philosophy of life, seldom practised, that empowers one to become aware of the links between language and emotion from which physical and psychological violence in human life originate. What makes Rosenberg's update worth reading is its articulation of a means of recognizing the clues in our selection and interpretation of language that reveal our real human needs. The book offers a framework for gently uncovering the "viruses of language form" in which we either lose ourselves or ignore others in unwitting ignorance. It reveals, by extensive reference to Rosenberg's own rich experience in mediation and conflict resolution around the world, how these conventions of form often obscure our true needs and those of others rather than help us discover what these needs really are so that we can cooperate to get them met.
Acknowledging that the insight and empathy, whether for other or self, required to do this is rare, Rosenberg's book will nevertheless be an enlightenment for almost all of us of an extraordinarily practical kind. More than a challenge, it is also an inspiration to try out the "NVC skills of language and listening" he both practices and skillfully advocates. It only leaves us wondering where we are likely to be reasonably safe doing so.
Incredible guide to Joyous Living & Giving 2008-08-27
To me, Nonviolent Communication, the book, is a superb guide to healing, and life, helping me to be how I want to be in the world. I had a hard time with the language the first time I read it, and I know that some of it could be said more beautifully, but I've read it several times now (the second time I started with the last chapter I liked it more than the first), and given it to people. Here's why:
When I read this book, I found an assertion -- all human beings, just like you, wish for their own well-being AND for others' well-being AND take joy in being able to contribute to others' well-being. This is a core value or belief for me and I suspect that if you really can't accept that premise, the book would not be so useful and healing.
The book goes on to show examples of thinking that gets in the way of living this core value. Most wonderful of all, it offers tools to help us live in accordance with our values. Some of the tools are: the idea that feelings point to met or unmet needs; the list of needs; the differentiation of needs from strategies to meet needs; examples of how to find the feelings and needs in some common scenarios; the insistence on separating observations from judgments; the idea of listening for the needs underlying a person's words; the explanation of feelings as having internal origin rather than being 'caused' by others, etc.
The huge steps I've taken in the past 3 years toward peace, self-acceptance, and realization of my potential seem to have come from attending workshops and classes based on this book. When I re-read Nonviolent Communication, I find bits I missed the other times.
The chapter on self-empathy is particularly helpful on the problem of self-acceptance. I always had a lot of trouble with the mantras of "You deserve....", "You have a right..." Dr. Rosenberg helps me see all parts of myself, which helps me make choices that are aligned with all my values.
A real life-changer; ought to be taught in public school 2008-08-15
Participating in a weekend workshop on Nonviolent Communication about 15 years ago, before the first book was ever published, changed my life ever since. I was so excited when I later discovered a book had been published. I have since given this book as a gift many times. In almost every case (the cases in which the person actually read the book!) the person had a very similar experience to my own. This book will help you see communication (and relationships) in a whole new way. As a therapist I have found this book to be helpful to clients with anger management difficulties and problems with conflict in relationships. It also promotes self-awareness and self-acceptance. It takes practice, but once you understand and internalize the general attitude promoted in this book, it sticks. And then it seeps into your life like a soothing balm. That's right, like a soothing balm. Try it; you'll see what I mean.
Great book 
2008-08-11
Rosenberg's practice of empathy is profoundly changing my self awareness and my relationships with others, like my other favorite book about love and communication I Love You. Now What?: Falling in Love is a Mystery, Keeping It Isn't
This book changed the way I communicate. 2008-07-24
Do you hunger for skills to improve the quality of your relationships, to deepen your sense of personal empowerment or to simply communicate more effectively? Unfortunately, for centuries our culture has taught us to think and speak in ways that can actually perpetuate conflict, internal pain and even violence. Nonviolent Communication partners practical skills with a powerful consciousness and vocabulary to help you get what you want peacefully.
In this internationally acclaimed text, Marshall Rosenberg offers insightful stories, anecdotes, practical exercises and role-plays that will dramatically change your approach to communication for the better. Discover how the language you use can strengthen your relationships, build trust, prevent conflicts and heal pain. Revolutionary, yet simple, NVC offers you the most effective tools to reduce violence and create peace in your life—one interaction at a time.
Over 150,000 copies sold and now available in 20 languages around the world. More than 250,000 people each year from all walks of life are learning these life-changing skills.
Excellent book for all! 2008-06-26
Literally, anyone who speaks could benefit from reading this book! It helps us to realize not only the power of words but how to choose them better and ultimately enhance both communication and relationships! Highly recommended! :)
A Common Sense Guide to Communicating Effectively! 2008-06-01
The entire premise of the book is about playing nice in the sandbox. It is unfortunate that we as human beings seem to forget that simple rule that we learned when we were very young...but we do.
Marshall Rosenberg explains in the introduction that he has two questions that have motivated him to find the answers to: He asks: "What happens to disconnect us from our compassionate nature, leading us to behave violently and exploitatively? And conversely, what allows some people to stay connected to their compassionate nature under even the most trying circumstances?"
These questions are truly profound and Rosenberg does an exceptional job of answering both of them in his book.
Rosenberg notes that the first component of Nonviolent Communication is to observe without evaluating. In other words, apply empathy when communicating. This is easier said than done and takes time, patience and a willingness to change ones behavior. There will be mistakes along the way, but change does come with the right attitude.
The second component is to express our feelings. It encourages conscious responses bases on awareness of what we are perceiving, feeling and wanting rather than being habitual and auto responding without thinking. In other words, Rosenberg recommends critically thinking through what to say before saying it. Words are weapons and they need to be handled skillfully or they will be harmful!
There are many insightful comments throughout the book. For example, Rosenberg says: "It is the rare human being who can maintain focus on our needs when we are expressing them through images of their wrongness."
This book and other excellent books on communication help us understand each others needs better. With a little shift in our thinking we can be better communicators!
The Re-Discovery of Common Sense: A Guide to: The Lost Art of Critical Thinking
Nonviolent Communication 2008-05-25
I loved this book! I found the tecniques easy to grasp and easy to implement. Using nonviolent communication has already helped me with family, friends, at work, and even with myself. Communication is so important for successful relationships. I found this book to be most helpful!
Simple, but Not (Usually) Simplistic 2008-03-31
I received this book for free at a communication studies conference, and didn't think much of it. Then I started reading it.
The book is meant to be a handbook for carring on day to day communication with people in your life in a nonviolent way, which is defined as not passing judgment, making accusations, etc.
The downside? The formula the book describes can seem a bit cheesy and mechanical at first. The scripts suggested are fairly specific and involve some langauge that will strike many as sort of garden-variety touchy-feely stuff ("When you say that, what I hear you saying is that . . .").
But the underlying ideas about the importance of empathy, the unproductive nature of approaching communication (even argument) as adversarial, and the basic human decency that lies beneath the concepts are more important and can't be trivialized by what might seem like hokey language.
Thorough-going cynics will not enjoy the book, but others will find some new ideas (and reminders of some basic common sense) that are useful.
BTW, thre are a number of books that make some similar points, but do so using a martial arts analogy (which might seem odd, but is actually in keeping with the "nonviolent" ethos of this book). You might look at "Aikido for Everyday Life" and/or "Verbal Judo," particularly if "Nonviolent Communication" sounds like it's just a bit too, well, wussy for you.
