Customer Reviews
One of the lesser representatives from the underappreciated Season One 
2006-05-20
Many casual MSTies, particularly those who are unfamiliar with the complex licensing process that Best Brains used to originally secure the *temporary* rights to use films for MST3K, often complain about the selection of shows available on DVD. What they may not realize is that for the most part these choices are dictated by what Rhino can get or afford to pay for, which is why many fan favorites like will never see the light of day on MST DVD. For example: you'll never see any of the Season Three Sandy Frank/Gamera/Japanese movies on DVD, since Rhino would have to persuade both the original studio (Daiei) and Frank (who made the English-language dubs) to allow a re-release, and that's not gonna happen.
I mention this because it explains why, of all the Season One episodes Best Brains/Rhino could have released, they chose "The Crawling Hand": it's what they could get. This was only the fifth episode that Best Brains filmed during their national cable run (though it's labelled episode #106; see note below), and it *really* shows. It shows not merely in the cheaper-looking sets, or in the comically large piece of twine dangling from Crow's mouth during the host segments, or in Servo's clunkier body and different voice, or in the presence of Dr. Erhardt. No, it shows most of all in the flat-out lameness of the riffing: I'm a big fan of the Season One episodes, but even I won't dispute that the first five shows were among the most boring and slow-moving ones they ever cranked out. The lightning-quick interplay and sixth-sense comic timing that Joel and the Bots would become legendary for is nowhere to be found. In fact, "The Crawling Hand," coincidentally enough, marks the END of the truly sub-par period of MST3K: immediately after this episode, with the movie "Robot Monster," the show's writing, riffing, and delivery became considerably more focused. By the end of the season, on classics like "The Black Scorpion" and "Moon Zero Two," MST was beginning to resemble the show we all know and love.
Which is all the more reason why it's sad that this episode is the most easily available representative from Season One. The movie itself is actually a pretty interesting piece of bizarro filmmaking, featuring a truly insane premise (severed, murderous arm of an exploding astronaut can possess those nearby through use of psychic space germs? WTF??) and tons of great openings for Joel & The Bots to make hilarious wisecracks. The vast majority of those opportunities are missed, however, and what we get instead are an unamusing sequence of "hand" puns (folks, puns are the lowest form of humor), grating repetition, long periods of silence, and a general sense that the writers were struggling at this point. Season One could be so much better than this (try "The Black Scorpion," "Project Moonbase," "Moon Zero Two," "Untamed Youth," or "Robot Holocaust"), and I hope people will make an effort to seek out some of those episodes instead.
(Note: recently Rhino released a FAR better Season One episode, "Women Of The Prehistoric Planet," in the MST3K Collection Vol. 9. It's labelled show #104 but it's actually the last episode that was written/recorded that season, and it's therefore a great deal more mature and fast-paced in terms of riffing. It's still not the best Season One episode, but it's a far better representative of the promise that we first perceived in this goofy, quixotic DIY cable TV show back in 1989.)
Remember it from childhood. 2006-03-09
I remember when I was very young, like before 5, in the 60's and this movie would come on late night on a Saturday night on the "Fright Night" program. I never could remember getting pass the "push the red button" scene before falling asleep.
This movie was one of those types that were use to showcase a new talent. Much like the blob was used for Steve McQueen. But in the Crawling Hand, the "new" had no talent. Roger Coleman should have directed this movie. It would have been funnier.
But if you are a fan of Kent Taylor, His performance is good.
And also you have Alan Hale Jr., the "Skipper" of Gilligan's fame.
This is a movie without MST3000 
2005-09-19
All the reviews here seem to be for this movie which is a part of the MST3000 series. I am here to do a review on the movie, which I own and has nothing to do with MST3000.
An astronaut gets lost in space, boo hoo. However his arm washes up on a beach, now the fun begins. The arm comes to life and seeks out necks to strangle. It kills the landlady in a comical sequence which takes place in her bed. It also infects our 'hero', a hairy chested teenager who looks somewhat like Eddie Munster. The infection causes him to go on a killing spree. He attacks the soda shop owner ("No dancing not allowed. No dancing not allowed. Eat, Drink, and be merry, for tomorrow you die."), his girlfriend, and NASA G-men.
The sherrif (Alan Hale Jr. of Gilligan's Island fame) is a no nonsense lawman, who is after the killer. He's convinced it's our hero, but becomes unsure. You see the fingerprint left on the landlady's neck is from the missing astronaut. Ahh, the suspense rises.
All in all this is 1960's drive-in fodder. Kids back then probably went to see this just so they could make out in the back of their dad's Oldsmobiles. However, unlike a lot of small budget movies from back then, the sound and picture quality is above average. If you want to host a Halloween party for children and need some movies that aren't too scary but may still give a fright or two, than this is perfect. Also, if you are a fan of movies like "I was a Teenage Frankenstein" this is right up your alley. Mostly forgetable, but it has it's own unique charm.
Rough Going 2005-08-03
By that I mean the commentary, not the movie itself (which is beyond inept). This should be seen by anyone who did not get to see Season One of MST3k, and should thus be viewed within a historical context and to satisfy your curiosity. No wonder Jim Mallon refuses to let the KTMA and Season 1 eps see the light of day (except for "Hand"). If this is the best that they could muster for Season 1, then they could ONLY get better. The writing was rough- lame jokes fell flat (how many times can Weinstein pitch "He's smoking" or something similiar), and the one legitimate laugh came from the Invention Exchange. Joel was even more sleepy than in other episodes, and Trace hadn't quite busted out with Crow at that time in the show (he's pretty low-key). I am an unabashed Kevin Murphy fan, and the show was that much better for his Tom Servo (this isn't an attempt to slag J. Elvis Weinstein, but- oh, OK it is). Worth a rental, or if you can get it REALLY cheap. Otherwise, a very rare dud in the MST3K 'chise.
2 STARS (for historical value)
Five Fingers of Death! 2005-01-12
`Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.' I was at a loss as how to start my review, so I thought I'd go with one of my favorite Red Buttons quotes, which, coincidentally, contains a reference to hands, tying in somewhat to the film The Crawling Hand aka Don't Cry Wolf aka The Creeping Hand (1963). This review is for the non-MST3k DVD version of the film. For those who may be unfamiliar, there use to be a show on cable titled Mystery Science Theater 3000 (if you love bad movies, you need to check it out), whose specialty was presenting humorous running commentary to old, drecky films, actually making many of them bearable to watch. The show is long gone, but legions of fans still enjoy the antics of Joel (or Mike) and the `bots from their well-worn VHS tapes, and also, more recently, the various DVD releases of the show by Rhino Home Video, one of them being the `Mystified' version of this film (on a separate DVD, available on Amazon), which is why you see many reviews making reference to the show. Directed by Herbert L. Strock (Gog, How to Make a Monster, the original 1958 version, not the lame 2001 TV version), The Crawling Hand (boy, with a title like that, you know exactly what you're getting) stars Peter Breck, who also starred in the very good film Shock Corridor released the same year as this film, Kent Taylor (Satan's Sadists, Brain of Blood), and Rod Lauren (The Young Swingers). Also appearing is Alan Hale Jr. (yep, the Skipper, from the television show Gilligan's Island) and Icelandic born actress Sirry Steffen, whom some may remember from her brief appearance on the Beverly Hillbillies, as Marie the Maid.
The film begins with the loss of an astronaut returning from a mission, focusing on Steve Curran (Breck) and Dr. Max Weitzberg (Taylor), both working for the associated space agency, at a loss to explain what happened. What's so puzzling is the circumstances around the loss (this was the 2nd time it happened), as everything was going per plan, but after a mysterious communiqué with the 2nd astronaut, the spacecraft was destroyed (the astronaut appeared on the view screens looking sickly and pleading with mission control to hit the red button, which, apparently is the button used to detonate the craft). The craft was destroyed, but some pieces survived, like the astronaut's severed hand, which ended up on a beach, only to be found by college students Paul (Lauren) and his girlyfriend/exchange student Marta (Steffen). Noting that it might be something of importance, Paul returns later to collect the errant limb, but soon discovers it to have strange powers (no, it's not like a monkey's paw, granting wishes to its' owner) and a appetite for...murder (Paul's landlady finds this out the hard way)! As Paul wrestles with the abomination, he also gets a bad case of the space cooties, and begins trying to murder those around him, but never quite as successfully as the severed limb. Will Steve and Dr. Weitzberg be able to intervene and determine the nature of the evil brought that has arrived on Earth? Will they be able to help Paul before the police gun him down like a mad dog? Will Marta student visa expire before she gets a chance to renew it?
Okay, this isn't a very good film (it lists four, count `em, four writers), but I did get the feeling the original story might have been much better, suffering in translation to the silver screen (it wouldn't be the first time). I didn't mind that the very cheap special effects (the scenes with the crawling hand were often short, but sometimes the shadow of the rest of the body attached to the crawling hand was very evident), but what seemed to drag this film down was the poor writing and the extremely herky jerky pacing (there was a 20 minute scene near the beginning that spent way too much time on the needless development of the characters of Paul and Marta). I did think some of the make-up interesting, especially the characters affected by the space madness, looking like something the somnambulist character from The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari. The lighting is also extremely poor, especially the interior shots as shadows often presented themselves in an awkward manner as if the lights were pointing towards the actors at waist level from behind the camera. The acting isn't great, but it is unintentionally funny, especially when Breck, whose character was prone to hissy fits one would expect from a three year old, chewed up all the scenery. Alan Hale Jr., as a small town police chief, was kind of fun to watch (I kept expecting him to finish his sentences with the term `lil' buddy'), but would the police really use a station wagon as a squad car? I suppose they could, but they hardly seem suitable for the high-speed chases (the film does have one, sort of). My favorite characters had to be the ambulance drivers. I loved the part where they arrived to retrieve a dead body (the evil hand at work), and decide to investigate the deceased woman's refrigerator for beer. After finding a prone Paul on the floor (again, work of the evil hand), they have a brief discussion about what to do, as they were only tasked to pick up one body. These guys have to be independent contractors...the end, which couldn't come soon enough, wraps things up a little to conveniently (so, everyone is on board about that whole alien possession thing?) and tries to throw in a completely predictable twist.
The picture on this DVD better than I would have thought, but the audio was awful, often impossible to hear. There are no special features available, but there are chapter stops. I wasn't expecting a lot from this DVD, and that's exactly what I got.
Cookieman108
Little Buddy vs The Big Valley 
2008-07-07
There is an incredible divergence of styles in this.....On the one hand (unintentional), the total lack of presence and being of Alan Hale Jr. as he blunders through another character. Take a 180 and you're face to face with the over the top, shirt partially unbuttoned, arms flailing wildly for no reason method and style of Peter Breck. It's a wonder he took the time to smoke....
Smack in betwixt is a male lead who seems incapable of getting really excited about anything....A disengaged hand, a girlfriend on the beach....this guy is asleep at the wheel.
" No acting......not allowed ." 2007-10-31
Too funny for words. That part where Syd Saylor as the soda jerk, just has me on floor, everytime. " No dancing, not allowed." " No rats, not allowed." Ha ha Hee Hee Ho!!
Enjoyable even if not side-splitting 2007-06-24
As a long-time MSTie, I would like to offer a different viewpoint on this episode.
First, the not-so-good: This is definitely not the funniest season one episode, nor is it the most "different" (in so far as it is a sci-fi/horror flick that could just as easily have been part of season eight, say), and there are a few glaring moments when the jokes just stop coming. As a result, some viewers may find this DVD disappointing.
Having said that, I am not disappointed. I think this is easily one of the most entertaining episodes in season one, even if it is not the funniest. I find that some of the older episodes are quite enjoyable without being as hilarious or as polished as the show would later become; other examples of this would include The Black Scorpion and The Crawling Eye. This film is a great example of why I got into B-movies in the first place, before I was introduced to MST3K: the story is bizarre, the actor's performances uneven, the special effects are poor, and there are odd moments of levity juxtaposed against a confusing backdrop of gloom.
Also, keep in mind that while admittedly awful, this movie is far above the level of train-wrecks like Manos, The Incredibly Strange Creatures, or the Creeping Terror. No, I would not recommend watching it unMSTed, but I think that it is easier to wade thru then a lot of Best Brain's other material. So if you're like me, and derive some of your enjoyment of this series from elements other than the riffs themselves, this could be a worthwhile purchase. If, on the other-hand, you don't care about the host segments or the films themselves, you probably should look elsewhere. But, even this episode has a few classic lines -- I will never get over "Tell him I'm smoking" or "O magic lamp...." ^_-
Five Stars for Laughs 2007-02-27
What pathetic dialogue and horrible screen shots. The hand only has a close up, or a distant shot. Your 9 year old could do a better job. So why not laugh with Joel and his robot friends? Their dialogue is much better. This is a great movie to put down.
Outstanding entertainment 2007-01-31
I love this series and can't get enough. I was so sad to see the show end.
